06 November, 2010


What is this?  This is my stumbling block. In terms of it's overwhelming size, the camera does it no justice. It might as well be the size of Alaska.

This is how I've been feeling the last couple of days. Like 1 big ginormous stumbling block is in my way... personally, professionally, as a wife and as a mother.  I hate the feeling of being out of control. Yet that's all that I feel and it is scaring the hell out of me.  I need to change the behaviours and actions of others, but I can't.  I can only change mine. And it scares me. It scares me more than I can say.

But I received a gorgeous email today from one of my Twitter friends who is living in the Bay Area, she shall remain nameless but she knows who she is, and her email made me realize so many things.  Namely, that when I make an honest blog entry, like I did last night, it's going to resonate with at least 1 person.  And I have the email in my inbox to prove it. But what's even more spectacular than that, is that while she's telling me how much she related to my journey, I was relating to hers. It's strange how that works.

And I realized something after I closed the email down.

And that something is this: No matter what I'm feeling, no matter what stumbling blocks are in my way, no matter what obstacles the universe is throwing in my path, there is always at least 1 person who understands and can relate.  I'm not alone. I. Am. Not. Alone.

I still have concerns right now about things that are bigger than design, bigger than my business, bigger than anything.  And they are HUGE concerns.  But knowing that at least 1 other person out there is feeling what I feel, in some way or another, lets me know that, I can AND will, climb that stumbling block.  And when I get over it, when the problems that I'm facing have been dealt with, and put into their proper place, I know that I'll be able to look at the ginormous stumbling block that might as well be the size of Alaska and say, "Geez! Look at that little pebble I just walked over!"